As Promised

I can't believe the year is basically over. Wow...Where did the time go?

I promised a big entry, so here we go!


Semester One of Eight:

My first semester at Berklee was pretty good. I met a lot of great people, made a lot of great friends, and jammed with some really awesome musicians. I need to work on Ear Training a lot more this next semester. That was definitely my weakness. I also didn't jam enough. Need to do more of that. Networking as well. I also want to go to the Songwriting club more often, and by more often I mean actually go. I signed up at the beginning of the year with a friend and we had planned to go together, but it didn't happen. We also planned on starting a band, that didn't happen, either. Anyway.

One Wednesday evening in October, I went to the Music Business Gala thing. It wasn't a gala, but I can't remember exactly what it was called. Chris Carlson (here's his blog, good stuff), the President of the Music Business Club at Berklee gave a little speech. I already wanted to join the Music Business Club, but Chris's speech made me feel like I had to join it. So I did, and I met even more awesome people and learned a lot, too. A lot of kids in college were once (like me) overly-involved in high school. Sports, student government, community service, National Honors Society, etc... But once they get to college, they stop doing that sort of stuff. I didn't want that to happen to me, and it did at first, but like most things, I fixed it.

I think the highlight of my semester wasn't even related to Berklee. I went to eight Red Sox games. Eight. That's a lot for someone without season tickets. The John Mayer thing was pretty cool, too, but lately I haven't been Mr. Mayer's biggest fan. Nonetheless, his clinic rocked, but the Sox games were great. I went to seven of them alone, but you're not really alone at Fenway. There are 39,927 other people there. And I'm not even counting the staff or the players.

I didn't write as much as I would have liked to. I only wrote one song really. Lots of ideas, but they were just ideas. That's another thing I need to work on.

(I'll put a whole list of goals/resolutions/things to do at the end of this. I will also write them down. Goals are manifested by being written down. Anyone can talk about doing stuff, but how many actually do it? My guess is not many. I'll admit to being a bit of a talker (not a close-talker like in Seinfeld), but I say I'm gonna do stuff, and I don't do it. Well, that's gonna change, too.)

I saw a fair amount of shows at Berklee, too. Oh yeah, and they were amazing and either free or two dollars. Can't complain there!

Here are the "Academic" Berklee Resolutions/Goals:

--Spend an hour a day at a piano
--Practice Ear Training daily
--Get all A's
--Play more guitar. Let's shoot for an hour a day--at least.

Here are the "Non-Academic" Berklee Resolutions/Goals:

--Get a band together. First thing.
--Write a song a day.
--Meet two new people a week.
--Actually GO to the Songwriters Club at least once a month
--Keep my room as clean as I have been


Looking back, 2008 was a damn good year. Between all the concerts (Elton John, Alicia Keys, Billy Joel, Bon Jovi, John Mayer, Bruce Springsteen, the Who, and all the Berklee shows), the Red Sox games (eleven total, counting the three over the summer), and traveling, it rocked. As I said earlier, I met some really awesome people, and Berklee was good. I really can't complain.

As for non-Berklee Resolutions/Goals:

--Run three days a week; workout twice a week
--Eat healthier
--Look/Feel my best everyday
--Sleep better (haha)
--Find a good, upcoming artist every week
--Twitter better

I'll think of some more, I'm sure, but for now, I'll stick to those.

Happy New Year!

Busy Doing Nothing

I'm currently watching the first season of 30 Rock on DVD. I really haven't done much else this break. Other than playing at my cousin's wedding, I haven't played a whole lot of music. I've done a lot of listening (mainly to U2) and I'm starting to get back into writing. I had a disconnect with it over this semester, but I had a mini breakthrough with it last night. The song is called "Reflections" as of now, and it's basically an older me talking to my current self. It's not finished yet, but I really like it. It has the potential that my other songs haven't had lately.

I will do a big post tomorrow. I'm so lazy right now, I'm not even going to do labels.

Faraway, So Close!

In approximately 53 hours, I will be done with my first semester at Berklee. I know I said I wouldn't update, but I'm in MTEC..what else is there to do in MTEC? I already played my final project and handed in my work. I planned on studying, but I left my harmony binder in my room.

So now I just have to wait, quickly get back to my dorm, grab my guitar, and go to my proficiency exam. I've got a bit of a break to do laundry (the pile is slowly eating my floor) and clean before my next class. Then from three until sometime into double digits, you can find me in a practice room. And I swear I will be in bed by 1.30 for real this time. I have my two most important finals tomorrow.

I'm faraway, yet so close. So unbelievably close.

The Last Hurrah

I'm going to have to take a break from blogging/Facebooking/Twittering until next week. It's finals time, and I need to focus my energy on studying, at least until next Wednesday.

Last night I went to the Battle of the B.E.A.T at Bill's Bar (talk about alliteration). I don't know who ended up winning, I only stayed for the first three acts (thanks, finals). I really only went for the second two acts: Jonathan Carr and Brian Dunne. Both Berklee students, both extremely talented. Both put on a great show. I wish I could have stayed for the whole thing, but there was (and still is) work to be done.

So from the looks of it, if I get an A- on my Ear Training final, then I'll end up with a B in the class. And if my math is correct, then I'll end up with a GPA of at least 3.4 for the semester. It could be anywhere from a 3.4 to a 3.7. If it weren't for Ear Training, it could be a 3.9. One of my goals for next semester is to get all A's. Not that it wasn't a goal this semester, but now that I know what to expect, I'll be able to hit the ground running--in more than one area.

I'm thinking about my dictation final in Ear Training tomorrow, and I'm not gonna lie, I'm scared shitless about it. If it weren't for dictation, I would have an A, guaranteed. Just thinking about makes me nervous. I really want to do well on it. I have to in order to get an A overall on the final. Ahhhh! Haha, I'm..I don't even know. I would really like my finals to be done. I'm cutting myself some slack because it's my first semester here and that somehow justifies it for me. It's a learning experience. It definitely is a learning experience.

I can't wait for the break for several reasons. Here's a list:

--I get to celebrate the end of the semester with some of my favorite people at my cousin's wedding in DC. I'll also get to sit in with the wedding band, hopefully.

--I have tons of ideas that need to be songs, and I have tons of songs that need to be finished. There aren't enough hours in the day for me to write right now.

--I get to see all my friends for real this time. I've seen most of them, but there are a couple that I have not, and that needs to be fixed.

--I also get to see Bob, but that's a given. It is still worth mentioning.

--The cruise. I can't wait for the cruise. It will be epic, and I can gamble!

--I'll be able to play guitar and not feel bad about not practicing what I should be practicing. I'll also get to jam with people that I haven't played with in a long, long time.

--CRANIUM!!!

--U2 will probably announce their tour to support their album due out later this year.

--Mantis Christmas Eve. Yes, it is ON! Liz almost cancelled, but then realized that she really didn't want to, and her children would have been devestated. Plus it's always hilarious.

--Second semester will be closer to beginning. I'm really looking forward to next semester. It will be a semester of epic proportions (inside joke, but I couldn't resist).


I could keep going, but that's enough. As you can see, I have a lot to look forward to.

Well, I have class in ten minutes. Then it's work, a few errands, more work, and a little TV for the night.

Wish me luck!

Hunger Pains

For the past seven hours I have had the most intense side stitches, and I didn't even go running. I don't know what caused them, but I think it may be because I barely ate anything today. I didn't even realize it until I was talking to my roommate. I've had less than 1,300 calories today, and I normally eat at least 2,000. I could never have an eating disorder because I couldn't handle a pain like this all the time.

So that's what these are. Hunger pains. I'm seriously going to start donating money to organizations that provide food to starving people/countries because what I experienced today is, at the most, one one-hundredth of what a truly starving/emaciated person experiences every day. Every single day. I can't handle seven hours, nevermind a whole day.

Vienna/Torn

Sometimes I feel like I'm the person Billy Joel is talking about in his song Vienna. I'm gonna break it down:

Slow down you crazy child
You're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart tell me why
Are you still so afraid?

At this point, I haven't really done anything that would warrant Bill to tell me to slow down. However, the rest of the verse is true. If I know I can do it, why am I afraid to do it? I'm not afraid. I don't have time right now to do what I want. "He who hesitates is lost." I hesitated this semester, and I lost, but not really. I just didn't do exactly what I had in mind. I didn't count on needing a transitional period. That set everything back.

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?
You better cool it off before you burn it out
You got so much to do and only
So many hours in a day

Currently, there aren't enough hours in the day. I've cooled off some things, and I've been setting other things on fire. So that's not really anything new.

But you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through
When will you realize...Vienna waits for you

Oh God...That's so true. I believe in a go-go-go lifestyle because of that saying really. I'm not quite as bad as the person in the song. At least not right now. I've slowed down some stuff and sped up others.

Slow down you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be
Before your time
Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight (tonight)

I tell myself this constantly. I'm always wanting to do more, but I can't always do more. It's a tricky situation. Some people walk through life because they don't want to miss anything. Some people run through life because they want to reach their destination as fast as they can. I fall somewhere in between those two kinds of people. I think I jog through life. I don't spend too much time on any one moment like some of the walkers would do, but I don't keep my eyes on the prize all the time like the runners do. I speed up more than I slow down, though. Sometimes I stop and smell the roses, but generally I'm going at a brisk pace.

Too bad but it's the life you lead
You're so ahead of yourself
That you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong
You know you can't always see when you're right (you're right)

This part's not so true about me. Sometimes it is, but on the whole it's not. I do get ahead of myself, but I haven't forgotten what I need. I'm quite aware of what I need.

You got your passion you got your pride
But don't you know that only fools are satisfied?
Dream on but don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you

Passion, check. Pride, check. However, I can be satisfied. At least for a moment. It doesn't last long because dwelling on anything--good or bad--is not healthy. It's okay to be nostaligic once in a while.

Dream on but don't imagine they'll all come true. How many times have we all heard that? I always find it somewhat amusing and irritating when successful people tell the public stuff like that. You had a dream, and it came true. Well, why can't my dream or somebody else's dream (or dreams) come true? Every single successful/famous person was at one point a normal person with a dream. I don't think Billy Joel's telling us to give up on our dreams, but still, it's not overly encouraging. However, he redeems himself in "James".

Slow down you crazy child
Take the phone off the hook and disappear for a while
It's alright you can afford to lose a day or two
When will you realize...
Vienna waits for you.

At this point, I don't feel I can afford to lose a day. Nevermind two.

And you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through

Already talked about...

Why don't you realize...Vienna waits for you
When will you realize...Vienna waits for you

And Vienna most definitely isn't waiting for me.


I've been feeling torn lately on what I want to do. I know that no matter what I choose to do, I will be happy with my choice. It's just a matter of choosing. One choice (A&R rep) would please just about everyone I know, but I'm not sure if that's what I want to do. It would be the safer of the two. The other option is being a performing songwriter. That would probably please just about everyone I know, but only if I made it "big."

The lyric from "James" that I love so dearly is
Do what's good for you
Or you're no good for anybody

I have time to figure out what's good for me. Thanks, college. I'm going to test out both fields. I'll get a band together for the latter, and I'll intern at record companies over the next four years to get a feel for the first.

To quote one of my own songs:

You've gotta let whatever happens happen
Let things fall into place

More of the Same/A Minor Setback

I'm back on my productivity kick. Not that I ever really stopped. I've got seventeen days until I'm done my first semester. I have a ton of work to do, too. As well as a ton of working out to do. I don't know why, but I was an eating machine today. I ate everything in sight really. That was not good. I'm definitely going for a run and/or hitting the gym for a vigorous workout. I need to.

That being said, it's full steam ahead for the next two and a half weeks.

I must go, there is work to be done.

Eighteen Days

Where the hell did the time go? One year ago today I had my audition for Berklee, and now I'm eighteen days away from the end of my first semester. How the hell did that happen?? A year ago I had plans to come here, get a band together in a matter of days, start gigging around Boston, and see where it could bring me. I still fully intend on doing that, just not yet. There's not enough time right now to do that. Everybody has a shit ton of work to do, and with finals two weeks away, there's little to no time at all to start rehearsing.

I'm not complaining at all. I had to ease into my first semester. It was my transition period. Now next semester's a whole different ball game. I will get a band together, and we will play out, and maybe (hopefully) record a demo. I can't wait. My entire break is going to be devoted to writing songs and playing guitar. At the moment, I have very little time to focus purely on the songs. I have way too much other stuff going on to write songs at the level I want to. In eighteen days I will, though. And I will take full advantage of it.

I'm really looking forward to the future. Big time. A lot of stuff is going to happen. Just wait. Just you wait. I know it's hard, but trust me, it's worth it. I'll make sure of that.

Discombobulated, Yet Organized

I have been ridiculously confused for the entire month. Ever since the election, I've had to ask myself what day it is because the election was on a Tuesday. Nothing happens on Tuesdays. Movies come out on DVDs on Tuesdays, and that's all that ever happens. So that threw me off. Then the following Tuesday was Veteran's Day, giving us a day off from school. Everyday feels like the day it's not. Today's Sunday, but it feels like a Monday. Tomorrow's Monday and it's probaby going to feel like a Thursday. The weather isn't helping, either. It was 65 yesterday. Sixty-five! In November! At least it was the right temperature today. As much as I would love it to stay warm so I could run outside, I would be unbelievably confused.

I can't wait for Thanksgiving. It's not like I need to get away, I just need to see some people. A lot of people actually. It sucks that I only have Wednesday through Sunday to do so. I have to see Bob, my life basically depends on it. And I'm only kidding a little bit. I miss Alex so much more than either of us ever thought possible. I saw him probably 350 out of 365 days a year for fifteen years. To go from that to never seeing someone is a lot harder than you would think. I can't wait to see my sister. Thank God I'll see Drew Friday. And Saturday. And Sunday. There are so many people I could list right now, but it would take days.

Aside from my confusion and heartaches, I'm really on top of my work. I still have 10 days before I go home, so I'll be 100% work free at the rate I'm going. I'm determined to be. It will happen. I have too much to do and not enough time to worry about Berklee.

A Wasted Day?

As I mentioned in my last post, I'm going to be uber-productive until Thanksgiving break. And I am, and I will continue to do so. I just had a minor setback today, but I still managed to accomplish a couple of things. I finished creating my ideal schedule for next semester, I joined the Tennis and Racquet Club, I finished the rough draft of my essay (which is terrible), I did my Ear Training homework, and I practiced--which is a bigger deal than it should be. All of this was completed between the hours of 12 PM and 8 PM, with the exception of my essay which I completed at 3 AM.

Despite all that, which really isn't all that much, I feel like I wasted today. I woke up late. Granted, I was up late, but still. It's annoying, but it's in the past. So now I'm just gonna keep chuggin' along, full speed ahead for fifteen days.

I'm still on my I-have-to-go-to-Manhattan kick. I won't get over that until I actually go to the city, which won't be until next semester. I have two free weekends from now until the end of the semester. One of which is next weekend, and that would conflict with my productivity kick--which is more important to me right now.

I haven't been productive creatively lately. I'm gonna fix that. Right now.

Seventeen

Seventeen is a magic number. In seventeen days I will be home for Thanksgiving, which means I have seventeen days to get as much done here as humanly possible. I plan on getting as much practice time in, as well as doing as much as I can in my College Writing and Ear Training classes (I have a syllabus in each class), and working out as much as possible. All while maintaining somewhat of a social life. I want to have a work-free Thanksgiving break. Or at least as work-free as possible. I also need to lose some weight I have recently gained. I don't care about my actual weight (muscle weighs more than fat anyway), I care about how I feel. Right now I don't feel as good as I could physically. Exercise is good for more than just fat-burning/muscle-gaining, too. It's a stress-reliever, and it helps you sleep better (and I'm sure I'm not the only one that could use a better night's sleep). If I may quote Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon in "Legally Blonde"), "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands." So true, Elle. So true.

That being said, I better get to work. There's a lot to do between now and November 26th.

But I Know Just What I'm Needing

And I don't want to waste more time. Oh, Billy Joel, why are you so good? Honestly, I can't take so much greatness. Words cannot express how much I love that man and his music. He could write the soundtrack to my life. Twice. I really am in a New York state of mind right now. I haven't been since February, and it's killing me. I used to think I could never live in New York, but I have changed my mind. The more I think about it, the more I can see myself there in the future. Either that, or I've been watching 'Seinfeld' and listening to Billy way too much these days. I do have to hit up the city soon, though. I miss it. A lot.

I have my schedule for next semester planned out. The only problem is, as of right now I have 17 credits, and you can only have 16 per semester. You can have more, but each additional credit is almost one grand extra. I can, however, do credit-by-exam for Arranging, and then I'll be able to take all the electives I want.

Speaking of school, I have to get some stuff done. Actually, I have a lot of stuff to get done.

Can vs. Should

There's always an ongoing battle between what one can do, and what one should do. I have several things I can do tonight, and I have several things I should do tonight. I can go to a party tonight, but I should get my work done. I can go out tonight, but I should play guitar. Well, tonight what I should do wins. I'm gonna get my work done, play my guitar, write some songs, and just lay low tonight. It's good to do that once in a while. I think I would be out of commission tomorrow if I were to go out tonight. So why not be productive tonight and tomorrow? Stay on top of things that should/need to be done and have more time to do things that can/you want to do. Sounds logical to me.

The Halfway Point

Can you believe I'm halfway through my first semester? I can't. I had three midterms today. Back to back to back. I aced my Guitar Lab midterm. It was almost funny. If my math is correct, then I received a B on my Ear Training midterm, which I'm happy with. I was aiming for a B (an A was out of the question). I completely owned my Harmony midterm. I struggled for a bit, but then I had a breakthrough and blazed right through it. I left the classroom beaming. I felt great.

As you all know, Friday is Halloween. I'm wicked excited for it. Julia and I are going to BC (finally!) for trick-or-treating and a dance. I won't reveal my costume(s) (I might go as two things) yet. I'll let the pictures/videos do the honors.

Now for some random thoughts:

-I haven't talked to Bob in over a week. That's not good.
-I'm so obsessed with the Script that I ordered yet another CD/special package thing from the UK.
-Julia hasn't called me yet. I think she lost her phone in her bag again.
-What am I gonna do with six pairs of tube socks?
-I should put new strings on USA.
-I need to finish these songs.
-Eric's playing his music so loud that the stuff on my desk is shaking.
-There's a really awesome kid playing here tonight. I'm excited.
-My room is really clean. Not that that's out of the ordinary.
-I said a lot more than I thought I would.

Okay well, I'm gonna go do something with my life now.

(College) Life (in General), and the Who

This is about more than just college life, but I'll start with that.

College..What can I say about it? What can't I say about it? It's a great place. It really is. I've made some really great friends, and it's been a great seven weeks. I have no complaints (other than midterms are coming up), and even though sometimes I crave a campus and books, I know that if I had it I would be begging for concrete and lead sheets.

That being said, I went to my first party tonight. It's funny because my mom was just asking if I had been to any yet and I told her no. It was more of a jam session than a party, but nonetheless there was people and noise (the liquor stores had all closed, not that it had any affect on me). It was pretty fun. I met some cool people, so it's all good.

I have my remaining four midterms this week. Guitar Lab, Ear Training, Harmony, and Writing Skills, in that order. I'm not concerned with my Guitar Lab midterm at all. I have a few patterns to memorize, but it won't be a problem. Easy A. I'm a little worried about my Ear Training midterm because I'll probably end up singing the hardest melodies we've done. It's completely random, but I'll end up singing the most difficult ones. It's alright, I have until Wednesday. I'm not worried about the material on my Harmony midterm, I'm worried about the time limit. I only have 50 minutes, and I really want to ace it. If I study enough, I'll be fine. I know what I know, and I know what I don't know, if that makes sense. I have to work on what I don't know more than what I know, and I know that makes sense. My Writing Skills midterm shouldn't be too difficult. Plus it's not until Thursday. Plenty of time to prepare. I'm more concerned about getting my homework done than I am about doing well on my midterms. I have to write a list of changes I would make in secondary education in America, create a track on Reason, write out a drum pattern with a bass line that grooves with the drums, and study. All of this is due by Wednesday (most of it is due Tuesday).

On top of all that, I have to go for a run tomorrow and start eating healthier. I'm going to start a food journal. I have to, otherwise I'll live off cereal and sweets with the occasional peanut butter sandwich. Okay, so it's not that bad, but it's not that good, either.

I also need to start a "career journal." I know what I want to do already, so it's more like a direction journal. How to get to where I want to be. Technically, I already have one started. My lyrics/idea notebook is exactly that. This one will be much more focused. Which is what I need to be, focused. It's not like I'm scattered now, I just need to straighten a few things out, but don't we all? In a way, I'm waiting to get it together. I actually have a song by that title. It's not done yet. Fitting. Just give me some more time, I swear it'll all work out.

Once again, Pete Townsend acknowledged my existence. I went to see the Who last night with my mom, Susan, and my friend Tom. And once again, it was an incredible experience, and an unforgettable night. The third time's the charm. Last night was only my second. You probably have no idea what I'm talking about, but if you do, you know I'm right. It's almost happened twice, thrice if you count Billy Joel. Next time. This also gives me more time to prepare. I could use it, too. Eventually, none of this will be necessary.

I'm gonna leave you now. Probably somewhat confused by that last statement. Cut me some slack. After all, it's almost two in the morning.

(The funny thing is, that's exactly what I want)

Midterms

Before I take on the tasks of yet another busy day, I need to update.

I have my first two midterms tomorrow. The dictation portion of my Ear Training midterm, and my Ensemble midterm. I'm not too concerned about them, that's not to say I haven't been studying for them. Studying isn't the best word for preparing for midterms. Preparing is actually a much better term. Ha. Anyway. The rest of my midterms are next week. The only one I really have to study for (and I mean study) is Harmony. Not because I don't know the material, but because I have 50 minutes to make sure I know the material. I fully intend on acing it with time to spare. Fortunately, I have six more days until said midterm. As far as my Guitar Lab midterm is concerned, I just need to look over a few songs and I'll be fine. Thanks, Bob. That class is an easy A. It's almost too easy. And now that I don't have to use the Berklee Method, it's an even easier A.

Ratings Auditions are next week. I was going to audition, but I think I might wait until the end-of-the-semester auditions. I don't really have anything prepared, and since you can only audition once per semester, I'd have a better shot at boosting my ratings in December than I would next week. I know what I want to play, I just haven't worked it out yet.

Tomorrow night is the Who concert!!! I'm wicked excited, you have no idea. It's going to be epic.

I'll write more later. I have stuff to take care of.

The Amy Method

It's not about Berklee anymore. It's about me. I strongly dislike the Berklee Method, so I say screw it.

I have a new method, and it's called the Amy Method. And it trumps the Berklee Method.

Only BT's is better.

Time to get to work.

A Quick Break

I needed a break from my homework. I've been at it for basically three and a half hours straight. Yeah, a break is necessary at this point.

There aren't enough hours in the day for me to do everything I would like to. My homework takes up the majority of my time, and usually the remaining hours go to sleeping, eating, and the Red Sox/baseball. With midterms coming up I have to be on top of everything, even if I find some (okay, most) of my guitar-related stuff boring, I still have to do the work. I'm glad that midterms are this week because that means the semester is halfway done. Where has the time gone? I've been at Berklee for seven weeks already, and I've averaged about one Red Sox game per week. Ha!

I'm going to see the Who on Friday. I'm so excited! They are so good live. SO GOOD. I have amazing seats and I know it will be a night to remember.

Alright, back to work. I have to be at BU in a couple hours, and I've still got a decent amount of stuff to do. My mind has to be solely focused on the game tonight. I'm grinning thinking about it.

It's Just A Moment, This Time WIll Pass

My motivation has returned, but I felt the need to update before I begin tackling my workload.

Honestly, I would love if this semester was done now. I'm not in the mood for school. Even if ear training will help me become a better musician, I really don't enjoy doing it. I refused to sing in class yesterday, and I promised my teacher I would sing Friday so I better be ready. I will be ready. I'm gonna ace whatever he throws at me. I got this.

Continuing on the subject of not being in the mood for school, I have an essay due tomorrow. It's a compare and contrast essay, and I think I'm going to do it on the two presidential candidates. It's the most relevant topic I can think of, and I have sooo much to draw from (which is a blessing and a curse). However, just like ear training, I really don't feel like doing the work. I'm motivated, just not motivated to write an essay.

Harmony might kill me. We went from talking about the modes of a major scale (easy easy easy stuff) to writing out guide tone lines. I know all about guide tones, but writing out actual lines? Easier said than done for me. Now this is something that I don't ever see myself using. Ear training, yes. Creating drum patterns, yes. I use English every day, but guide tone lines? Guide tones themselves, yes. But lines? Well, unless I become extremely proficient at piano, no. I don't think I'll ever be writing out guide tone lines outside of Berklee. I could be wrong, but I don't think I am.

There are some moments where I question my decision. I love Berklee, I do. It's not about that. I do feel as if I "belong" here, I just question whether I "belong" some place else sometimes. I'm happy here, but I know for a fact I could be happy anywhere--anywhere near Fenway Park that is. Ha, I'm kidding. I can be happy anywhere. We all know that. And I am happy here. In the words of U2:

And if the night runs over
And if the day won't last
And if your way should falter
Along the stony pass
It's just a moment
This time will pass

Motivate Me

I have so much to do right now, and I'm so unmotivated to do it. I came back from long run, all hyped up to be productive, and now I'm just not.

This seems to happen more often than not these days. I get back to my dorm ready to go, sit down at my desk, and nothing happens. Literally. I don't do anything. I obsessively check my email, Facebook, a few other sites, and listen to music. Even right now, it's taking me a lot longer than it should to type this. I don't think I'm having my what-the-fuck-am-I-doing moment. No. Things would be much more extreme. It's a combination of factors. That's all I think it is. The Red Sox loss (I still believe in them), coming back after being home (okay, so that's a roundabout way of saying 'I miss Bob'), and just knowing I have so much to do makes me not want to do it. I don't even think I could write a song right now.

I'm just not feelin' it. I better go before I make myself depressed.

It's All Too Familiar

The Red Sox are doing it again. They love to drag out the ALCS in an extremely dramatic fashion and then walk right through the World Series. It's emotinally and physically draining, though, to watch your team get blown out by a bunch of rookies (okay, the Rays aren't all rookies). The Rays are an exceptionally good team. But we got Dice-K throwing Thursday.

Thank God tomorrow's an off-day. The Red Sox need it. And I might need it more than they do.

Catching Up

As I type this, I'm sitting on my couch. I'm home for the weekend, and I have a beautifully hand-crafted schedule that allows me to miss my Thursday and Friday classes (just this once, though. I won't abuse it). I only had one class today, and I would have left early Friday so I decided to take an extra-long weekend. I've spent most of my day catching up with people so I thought, 'Hey, catch up on your blog.' I sat down a few times earlier this week and tried to write something, but I wasn't feeling it. Luckily I am now.

I woke up Monday morning at 8 after getting roughly five hours of sleep to get in line to get a ticket for John Mayer's clinic at Berklee. I missed English and my Guitar Lab to stand in line for two hours. I made myself go to Ear Training, where I ended up having to sing in class, and I failed miserably. It was alright, though. Keep reading to find out why.

Despite the Red Sox loss on Sunday night, a very good thing came out of it: I met and a befriended season-ticket holder. He didn't want to go Monday night's game, so I bought a couple tickets off him--and boy, am I glad I did. Julia and I (and Katie Lannan) enjoyed a fantastic playoff game. The energy was ridiculous. It was definitely the most important game I've been to, and probably the best. It was a blast. I couldn't have asked for a better Monday night in Boston.

John Mayer was hanging around Berklee the few days (he still is. Actually, he's recording with Berklee students until Friday). Word got out that he was in a class in room A15. So I went down and waited outside the door (it was about 8:15 at night when I got there). There were about a dozen other people there as well. Some people left, some people stayed, some people came. Eventually, Pat Pattison (look him up) came out to us and said, 'Okay, I'll open then door, but you guys can't come in. Okay?' We unanimously agreed. At that point, John was talking about how he approaches the blues (perfect timing for me). Really cool stuff. About ten minutes later, Pat Patisson motioned us to come in. I was luckily one of the first people inside the room and had a really good seat. He talked a bit more about soloing and stuff before deciding to play 'Gravity' and let us sing along with him at the end. I met him afterwards. It was cool. Really nice guy. I told him how much I loved his blues and he thanked me for telling him that. As he was walking out of the building he said, 'I wanna go back to 1997! This was my home!' We let him walk out in peace because he let us come in and sing with him. Fair trade, I would say. I was walking down Boylston street later on and I saw him and said, 'Thanks, John!' and he waved back and said thanks again. Pretty neat, eh?'

I should have skipped my Music Tech. class. Once again, it was a complete waste of time, and I was tired from the game and I knew I would have little to no sleep that night, but I went anyway. After my last class and my tutoring session, I went out to meet some friends and camp out to be in the first or second row at John Mayer's clinic. When I arrived (around 6 PM), they were all packing up their stuff. We weren't allowed to line up until 11 AM Wednesday morning. Well, about ten of us were in line outside the Berklee Performance Center (BPC) at 11 PM. A security guard came up to us and asked, 'Hey, are you guys in line for the clinic?' 'No, we're just chatting.' The security guard said, 'Oh, okay,' and walked off. A few people stayed while the rest of us went to Dunkin Donuts to make it look less obvious. And it worked. We stayed out all night. I met some wicked awesome kids. We bonded over our 24 hour (somewhat useless) camp-out.

(Long story short in regards to it being useless: Turns out (I was in class) that everyone in line got kicked out and security was in front of the BPC until then. Well, my group ended within the first five rows so it was fine. Staying up all night was wicked fun, but sleep might have been better.)

John's clinic was amazing. Go here to read about it. I didn't get to ask him a question, but I did get him to play 'Taking On Water'. I was in the second row, and he said, 'I'm gonna play one more song,' and I shouted, 'Play a new song!' And he did. It was wicked cool. He signed my guitar, too. So now I can say I have a John Mayer signature guitar. Ha.

Unlike my other celebrity encounters, I wasn't starstruck by John Mayer. It wasn't because he's just a regular guy (Bruce Springsteen is more of a regular guy than John Mayer is, and yet I broke down after I met him). I don't know why. He's one of my favorite musicians/people. I was so composed when I met him and I didn't (I almost did) cry when he played at the clinic. He hasn't impacted me as much as my other influences have. You can hear Billy Joel in my lyrics, you can't hear John Mayer in my guitar playing. But that could be because we have a lot of the same influences. So maybe I play a lick that Mayer uses, but really it's a Clapton lick. So to me, it's a Clapton thing.

I left immediately after the clinic. I scurried up to my room, grabbed everything I could think of that I needed (and I forgot several things), and left. My dad picked me up. I slept the whole ride home, really. I went to bed at 10:30 last night. I was in such a deep sleep. Sadly, I had to wake up at 9:15 because I had a haircut. My hair looks good, but I'm still kinda tired.

It was weird to be back at my old high school. I went to visit some teachers. I don't really know how to describe what it felt like. After my visit, I went to the Primary School to go see Nancy, who was there for once. I hadn't seen her in months. The last time I saw her was May. It was so good to see her. We talked for a bit, and I showed her my guitar adorned with John Mayer's signature. She's one of the few people that has never heard me play guitar. And it's kind of funny when you think about it.

Even after stopping in to see Marty at work, I'm not done my rounds. I have to go and see Sensei. I told him I'd say hi when I'm around--even if I don't go to class. Plus, it's almost like seeing Mr. Curit.

I get to see Bob tomorrow. I'm so excited. I can't wait. Tomorrow will be the first time in SIX WEEKS that I get to spend quality time with Bob. I need it. Badly. I'm beaming right now just thinking about seeing him.



Talk about having an awesome week. Let's recap:

Sunday: Red Sox game (loss)
Monday: Red Sox game (ALDS victory)
Tuesday: John Mayer meeting
Wednesday: John Mayer clinic
Thursday: Saw Nancy
Friday: Seeing Bob (and Dale and co. arrives!)
Saturday: My cousin's wedding (which is the reason I'm home)

If you made it this far, hats off to you. I'm done

11-1

I don't know what happened to Josh Beckett last night. He didn't show up for work. I knew it was gonna be a long game when he walked in a run in the first inning, but I didn't expect it the game to go into extra innings and end in a loss. I don't think anyone did--including Mike Scioscia. That wasn't the only weird thing about the game. Jacoby Ellsbury hit a routine pop fly that somehow no one caught (allowing three runs to come in. Nice job, kid), and Jason Varitek got a hit (that in itself is a big deal). It wasn't a typical postseason game. But then again, there really is no such thing as a typical postseason game.

We'll get 'em tomorrow night.

And I will be there.

Soxtober

October has always been a favorite month of mine. The leaves change, school becomes routine, and the playoffs start. Soxtober. It's back, kids. And for the first time, I can truly be a part of Soxtober. Being a mile from Fenway has more benefits than I can list. The best one being that I could possibly go to every home game--including Sunday's. I cannot tell you how, but if you were to bet money on whether or not I will be at Sunday's game, it's a pretty safe bet.

Running

I've always had an afinity for running. For as long as I can remember, I've been a fan of the sport. It's so liberating for me. There are very few things I enjoy as much as I enjoy running (baseball and music are excluded, obviously. They are my two passions in life).

Why do I run? I'll tell you why. It doesn't take much to make happy, and not much makes me happier than looking up at the sky when I run. That's one reason why. As I run along the river, I glance up at the sky every so often and grin with pure joy. I then seem to speed up a bit, slow down, look at the sky, speed up, slow down, repeat until exhaustion.

Another reason I enjoy running so much is because it's my ultimate stress reliever. And when I say stress I don't mean stress from school or anything like that. If I have a headache, as odd as it sounds, I go for a run, and within minutes it's gone. Running takes away emotional and physical stress like you wouldn't believe. Between music and running (and other physical activity), it's no wonder why I basically have a stress-free life. Part of it's personality, too, I bet. Don't let drama into your life. Some might say that's easier said than done, but it's really not.

Running lets me think without thinking. I'd rather sort out my thoughts while running than sitting in a quiet room. It really clears my mind. I feel like the weight of the world is off my shoulders when I run--even if it's just for a moment, it's amazing. I feel so empowered when I run sometimes. Like I can do anything. My feet may be on the ground, but it certainly doesn't feel like it. It's a natural high for me. Seeing that sun in that sky...I almost feel like I'm there when I run. Even in the heart of a city, something about running takes it all away. I'm in my own world.

And on top of all of my personal benefits of running, it gets/keeps you in shape. Running a few times a week is unbelievably beneficial to your health. It helps me sleep better (which is good because I still haven't been sleeping well) as well as keep me in shape. But we all knew that, didn't we?

I could go on for hours about how much I love running. You should go try it for yourself.

Oh, and don't use a treadmill. Feel the wind on your face and the earth beneath your shoes.

I'm So Excited!

I cannot contain my excitement right now for many, many, many reasons. Here are a few of the reasons:

-For starters, I will see Bob in ten days! Ten! That in itself is enough to make me excited. by the time I see Bob, it will have been six weeks to the day that I last saw him. You have no idea how much I have missed him. Ask Julia.

-I'm back in the groove of songwriting. Another cause for celebration.

-A close friend of mine is making huge steps in getting his career as a musician going. I'm so happy for him.

-In 26 days, I'm going to see the Who! THE WHO! As I have written before, I love the Who and they are definitely one of my favorite bands ever. I can't wait to see them. It's going to be amazing. AMAZING!!!!!

-The rain has almost completely stopped. Which is great for more than one reason. Continue reading.

-I have tickets to tonight's Red Sox game! First base side, three rows off the field, right behind the Red Sox on-deck circle. I can't even express my excitement for that. It's the equivalent of seeing Bob. So I have double the excitement that I (as of late anyway) normally have.

It would be an understatement to say life is good right now. Life is fucking awesome--and I don't swear a lot.

We're Getting Somewhere

And I mean that. Breakthroughs are on the way. I swear--I made a list. This will happen. You don't know what "this" is, but I do. And, right now, that's all that matters.

The gears will turn. But the screws have to be in first.

I've accepted, no, I've embraced where I am right now. I'm very excited about it, too.

Just wait. Just you wait.

Sometimes I'm Bad at Subjects

I've got some time to kill before my guitar lesson. I know I could (should) be playing right now, but I'm not.

I must say that Music Tech. is the worst class I have ever taken in my entire life. It makes chemistry sound like fun right now. Ask anyone in my class, they'll tell you the same thing. It's just that bad. Tuesday mornings are the worst. It's almost painful. If it weren't for wireless access, I would go out of my mind.

So I finally wrote a song the other night. About time, too (no, it's not about time). I had a bit of a drought, and I'm so glad I finally snapped out of it. It's always a scary feeling for me when I don't write a song (or create something) on basically a daily basis. I've finally found that groove again. I can't wait to see what follows. Pretty soon I'll have full recordings up. Drums, bass, guitars, piano, horns, etc... Just wait. It's on the way. It's on the way.

The only thing that still puzzles me is my inability to sleep through the night. I wake up at least once every night. Julia says it's because I don't hear the train anymore, and it could be. I thought it was because I was anxious for Bob to come home, but it issn't because he's home now and I still wake up. It could be just me not being used to a twin bed, but I don't think that's the case because I remain fairly motionless when I sleep. I have no clue, but I hope I can figure it out soon.

I could say a lot more right now, but I'll stop myself. I've got stuff to do.

Major Update

Alright, now that I have some time, I feel like I should update.

Berklee has been amazing so far. I've met so many great (and talented) people as well as reunited with some old Guitar Session buddies. All in all, it's been a blast so far. Other than an hour or so at the Registrar's office getting my schedule sorted out (it was a mess), it's been smooth sailing.

My classes are great. I like all my teachers. And I have an awesome schedule. The latest I'm ever done is four o'clock (plenty of time to get tickets to the game), and that's only on Fridays. I'm done at noon on Mondays, three on Tuesdays and Thursdays, one on Wednesday, and four on Fridays. And next Friday I'm done at one because of a concert going on! Woo!

I've spent just as much time at Fenway Park as I have at Berklee. In five days I went to three games. As Julia says, I have become Jimmy Fallon in 'Fever Pitch,' and she's right. Now that I live here, I have to go to as many games as possible. I even met the Guy that Sits Behind Home Plate! That was so cool. Basically I met a local legend. I plan on befriending him, if it's possible to.

It's funny: now that I feel like I'm forced to practice (otherwise I'll be sloppy and not get a good grade for, well, playing guitar (weird, now that I think about it..Being graded..)), I don't practice nearly as much as I did. I'm also kind of on a creative halt. I haven't written a song in a very long time. I have lyrics, and I have music, it's just that nothing fits. I need to get back into the swing of things.

I'm still trying to figure out the proper balance of homework, practicing/songwriting, socializing, and (by far the most important hahaha) going to Red Sox games. I think by the end of the month I should have it down to a science. Or at least by Midterms I'll have it all together.

Sometimes I wonder how I got in. I've heard so many great players, it (sometimes) makes me question my own abilities. But that only happens for a brief moment from time to time.

I do miss my friends (Drew, Alex, and Jordan in particular), and I obviously miss Bob more than I could ever say. My first lesson was weird. Even though I knew my teacher (Thaddeus Hogarth, possibly the coolest name ever) wasn't going to be Bob, I expected him to be. And even though I knew my lesson was only going to be half an hour, I expected to be there 'til who knows when. Yesterday's lesson was much better than my first.

I'm gonna go now. I need to pick up my room a bit before I get ready for bed. I should practice a bit, too. Or maybe I'll go join my neighbors in singing Something Corporate songs. Definitely one of the three.

It Has Been A Long, Long While

My apoligies. I haven't fallen off the face of the earth, I just didn't update.

I'm at Berklee now. It's awesome. I don't start classes until Monday, so I have way too much time on my hands right now. I went for a walk today and then rode my Ripstik down by the river. It was cool.

I don't have a whole lot to say at the moment. I'll write again later. Once things start happening. I have met a ton of wicked cool people so far. It's gonna be a great year/rest of my life.

Recap: Days Two Through Seven

I have been a bad blogger lately. So I'm going to try and make up for that. Normally when I am online, I'm talking with my friends (that I miss very much). Anyway. this is all copied from stuff I had written down.

Dublin, Day Two:

We took a bus tour. It was a "hop-on hop-off" bus. So we took the whole tour first, and then "hopped-off" at Dublin Castle. It was cool. The best part was the remnants of the Powder Tower. The Castle burnt down and was rebuilt at some point. Don't ask me when. I don't remember.

After Dublin Castle, we walked over to Christ Church. I'm not a big fan of "touring" churches (we didn't really tour, we walked around it). They all basically do the same thing, some are just bigger or older or of a different denomination. I'm more fascinated with how they built the churches back when they had no machinery. That is very cool. I tend to get bored with places like churches and museums rather quickly. I'm the only person I know that groans when someone suggests (when I'm in New York) going to the Met. It's like they just said, "Let's go stab ourselves in the eyes with needles." Okay, so maybe it's not THAT bad. But still...

On the other hand, the Guinness Storehouse was amazing. It was really awesome--even if we did sort of get lost getting to it. There's a big fountain as you walk in, and like any fountain, the bottom was flooded with coins. We look over and see a kid, maybe six or seven years old, standing in the water taking money! I wonder what happened to him. No one was saying anything. It was quite amusing.

That night we went to the area of Dublin called Temple Bar, named after Sir William Temple. It's where all the street performers go and stuff. Really cool place. Well, we went to a restaurant called "La Med". I had a cheeseburger, and basically died. There were onions ground in with the beef and I didn't know that. Basically, I was poisoned. It was bad. Later that night we went to Bewley's for dessert! That was good. Irish ice cream is amazing. It was very good.


Dublin, Day Three:

We hit up Kilmainham Gaol (Jail) today. It was wicked, wicked, wicked cool. I loved it. U2 filmed a video in the jail's East Wing. I thought that was awesome. I have become obsessed with U2 ever since I went to Dublin. I'm excited about that, though.

We walked over to the Irish Museum of Modern Art. It was weird. I didn't care for it at all. We took a taxi back to our hotel. My parents went somewhere, and I decided to check out a guitar store. Unlike American guitar stores, you can't just plug in and play. They keep the good guitars (Fenders and Gibsons) locked up or behind the counter. I didn't feel like asking to play them because I like my guitars better, and they probably wouldn't have let me because I wasn't seriously interested in buying one. They are wicked expensive, too! An American Standard Strat was 900 Euro! That's like $1500! They're $900 in the States (not that $900 is cheap)! Ridiculous.

We hit up Temple Bar again. This time we went to a reknowned Irish pub (actually, it was a "boxty house") called Gallagher's (Gallagher's Boxty House, to be specific). It was very good. I had a cheeseburger that was onion-free, and a dessert that was to die for. We sat next to these two very friendly Canadians.

That was that. We returned to the hotel and slept.


Dublin, Day Four:

We decided to go out to Malahide and see Malahide Castle. So we took the DART (Dublin Area Rapid Transit) out there. It was about a half-hour ride. It was also a lengthy walk from the station to the castle. It was a very pretty walk, though. The castle itself was very cool. But what was even cooler than the castle was the playground a little ways back. It was the coolest playground ever. Ever ever ever ever. I'm still in love with it.

And for the third night in a row, we went to Temple Bar. Shocker! Haha, only this time we did something aside from eat. We did a Pub Crawl. You go to a few pubs, and listen to Irish musicians. They play music and talk about the history of it. Then at the end they ask if anybody wants to/can play music. So I did. I played "Blackbird" and "Day Tripper". It was cool. then we ate a place called THUNDER ROAD Cafe!!! Thunder Road! Bruce! It wasn't too good, but still..BRUCE!


Copenhagen, Day Five:

We landed in Copenhagen at around 2 PM local time, and went straight to our hotel. A little while later we called up Steph. She came over around 6, I believe. We ate dinner and walked around the city center. We didn't do anything. The plan was to find a pastry shop, but we didn't. The three of us thought Steph knew where some good places were in the area, but she didn't. So we walked. And walked. And walked. Eventually we walked so much that we ended up back at our hotel. It was an uneventful day.


Copenhagen, Day Six:

We got off to a late start today. So late that I missed breakfast. Even in Copenhagen it rains. It rained today. It rained more today than it did in any day in Dublin..funny. We took yet another bus tour. It was a "hop-on hop-off" tour as well. So we "hopped-off" at another castke, and the Little Mermaid statue. Then we headed back to the hotel, rested, got ready, etc... And then we met up with Steph.

Tivoli Garden is one of the coolest places in the world. It was Walt Disney's inspiration for Disneyland. It was wicked awesome. The rides are so cool. There was one that was a combination of the Flying Trapeze and a slower version of the Dragon's Descent (there was a a real Dragon's Descent there, too). It was awesome. There was an upside-down rollercoaster and a bunch of other cool rides. Steph and I sampled a bunch. We also got homemade cotton candy. It was gooooood.

Steph went back to her place, and we went back to the hotel. It was a fun night.


Copenhagen, Day Seven:

We got up early today! And took another bus tour. We "hopped-off" at the Danish Resistance Museum (basically a mini Holocaust museum). It was very interesting. We also "hopped-off" at the Royal family's palace. We just walked around the grounds.

It was very sunny today! Well, until 3ish. Then it rained for a bit. We went over to Steph's exhibition. It wasn't just hers. It was the whole DIS's (Danish Institute of Design's) summer program exhibition. It was really cool. Steph won an award for her glassblowing, but would you expect anything less?

We took a bus (just a regular bus this time) back to the hotel. And now I'm here.

And now I'm not.

Tu Me Manques

As much a I love being in Europe, I do miss some people (yeah, you know who you are). It's funny though: Now that I have the Mac, I almost miss them more because I can communicate constantly. It definitely has more benefits than downsides, but still. It kills me in a way to know that I won't see ANY of my friends until the 19th at the earliest, and I won't see Bob until after the 22nd (sucks BIG TIME).

Most of you might ask if I miss them now, what will I do come Berklee time? Well, I'll have Danielle and Julia in the Boston-area. Julia (thank God) is right down the street, and Danielle is a T-ride away. Unfortunately, Drew is going be in UMaine (Orono), Jordan's going to be at Colby (Waterville), and Alex will be in DC (which is actually the easiest for me to get to). But college is different than being abroad with only your family--you make friends at school. Don't get me started on Bob. I hate knowing that I won't see him on Monday. Yes, I'll be in Copenhagen, but a big part of me wants to (almost needs to) see Bob on Monday.

...I just realized why I miss my friends so much. Everytime I've been to Europe, I've gone with at least one of my close friends (and Dale came once, too). This time I'm only with my parents! And we're not going 24/7. I don't have Debbie to entertain me. I don't have Mrs. Roller to get me lost at 1 in morning in Italy. I don't have Danielle to break any toilets or to fall asleep as the maintenance man comes to fix the drain. I don't have Jordan to be my on-again-off-again boyfriend. I don't have Julia to be the only European-looking American with me. It's much different, and I love change, but I think I enjoy Europe with friends more than I do with parents. Not that I'm not enjoying it, but you know what I mean. Even if I have a guitar, I'd rather have my best friends with me.

I think once we're out of Ireland, it'll be much more fun. Dublin's cool, but I can't wait for London.

My European Adventure! Day One: Dublin

At last, I am here. After much to do (flight cancelation, endless check it and security lines, etc...) I'm in the land of half of my roots. Dublin is not a city in the way I think of a city. There are virtually no skyscrapers, the streets are wicked small, and there's a pub every five feet (no lie). It's still cool, though. It doesn't have the hustle and bustle that American cities do. It's not beautiful in the same way that Paris and London are. It's got its own identitiy that I think it is very proud of.

The plane ride was..well, who honestly enjoys transatlantic flights? Not me. It was fine. Small layover in Heathrow was the same: fine. We landed in Dublin around 10:15 AM I believe. We took a taxi to our hotel, dropped off our bags and then had something to eat. After brunch (I would call it brunch. I had pancakes at lunchtime), we returned to our hotel and took a nap. I slept a good two hours, although it didn't do me much good (I was still exhausted). I took a nice, long, hot shower, and that made me feel a bit better.

We went to a wicked good restaurant called One Pico. It was excellent.

We walked back to our hotel and that was that. My body has no idea what's going on. Should I be tired? Should I be awake? I don't know. It's 5:45 PM back in Maine, and it's 10:45 PM here. I don't know what to do!

21 Hours And Counting

I have been awake for almost 24 hours. For almost an entire day, I have not slept a minute. I don't know why, I just couldn't get to sleep last night. I went up to bed around 1:30 AM, and just..couldn't. It was weird. Around four in the morning, I was in a really weird state of mind. I would have told you anything you wanted. I don't have any secrets that I can think of anyway, but if I did, I would have told them all to you without even caring. My guard was down completely. That's a weird feeling. Everyone has a guard, myself included. I was vulnerable, but there wasn't anybody around so it didn't really matter.

I still find it hard to believe I'm awake. And on top of it all, I wrote a pretty decent song last night and I went for a run at 5:30 this morning! That is unheard of for me. I was running with the sunrise. I saw it on my way back and it really gave me a boost of energy. It was a really cool sight to see. I hung around outside for a good hour after my run. Partly because I didn't want to open the garage door and wake my parents up (they aren't up yet), but mainly because it was such a cool morning and I just wanted to take it in.

Hopefully I'll be able to sleep tonight.

Bruce'll Stop The Rain

Saturday night was just about the best night of my life (or at least the best concert I've been to). Based on a purely musical basis, Bruce beats the Who and Billy Joel (the experiences I had at those two shows involve interaction with the artist. So..yeah).

Bruce is my guy. There is no one I love more than him. He's number one. With the exception of Mark Fisher, I don't know anyone that loves Bruce as much as I do. I can't even explain it. Like...I don't even know what it is about him that I adore so much. It's a combination of everything: the music, the personality, the beliefs, the showmanship, the energy, the band...I can't get enough of him. He's the only artist I love 24/7 (okay, he's one of two--Billy Joel). I go through a lot of phases. Some days I want to marry John Mayer, some days he gets on my nerves. I've never said, "You know, I'm not in the mood for Bruce." I'm always in the mood for Bruce. I've been like this for more than two years now, and there's no end in sight. If you get into Bruce when you're young, there's no stopping. You don't just stop being a Bruce fan. His music buries itself deep in your soul. It would take a million years for it to crawl out of you. And the only person that could possibly live for a million years is Keith Richards.

It poured Saturday night. And I mean that. I've never seen it rain so hard in my life. Bruce didn't come on stage until a little after nine. But he made up for being tardy (and he stopped the rain). His set-list was near-perfect. Only Ramrod, Bobby Jean, Darkness, and Candy's Room could have made it better. He's so wild on stage, I love it. I cried several times, to be honest. I get very emotional at concerts, especially at Springsteen shows. As Bob said: It's great to have heroes. Bruce is my hero. As big of a guitar freak that I am, I'll take Bruce over them all. They can't do what he does. Nobody can. And maybe nobody should. His shows are indescribable. He pours his heart out night after night. I would trade in ten Red Sox/Yankees games for one Bruce Show. Yes. I am being 100% honest (when do I lie anyway?). Bruce means more to me than any baseball game could. Game Seven field box seat at Fenway or floor seats at Bruce? Bruce.

I have an inexplicable passion for him. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Bye Bye Manny (Don't You Cry)

It finally happened. Every year there were rumors that Manny would be traded. Well, this year there were no rumors, only a trade. That's right. The longtime fan-favorite will no longer be seen in a Red Sox uniform. Manny Ramirez has gone to the Dodgers. The fist thing that crossed my mind was, "Wow, Manny's gone. I don't know how I feel about this." The next thing was , "Ha, he went to the Dodgers. He's playing for Joe Torre! That's ironic" (Manny ruined many games for Torre). And the third thing was, "This seems a bit familiar...Nomar Garciapara: longtime fan-favorite traded minutes before the deadline. Red Sox fans shocked. This is all too familiar..."

Now the last thought has a part two. After I thought of Nomar, I remembered what happened in that magical post-season: the Red Sox had the greatest comeback in sports history, and then went on to win the World Series. I had the same exact feeling about 50 minutes ago that I had four years ago to the day: a twinge of sadness, but a good feeling overall. It's ironic the way this trade happened. I think we'll have the same outcome that we had in 2004.

So Manny's gone, and we now have Jason Bay. He's a career .331 hitter in the five-hole, which is fine with me. He drives in about 100 runs a year and has somewhere between 25 and 30 homeruns a season. No complaints there. I'm excited to see how this turns out. Oh yeah, and I'll get to experience the majority of Bay's playing time this season in Boston.

All's Well That Ends Well

So as you know I went to the Red Sox last night and today (my hotdog theory has been proven wrong--which is almost good because I no longer have to spend $4.50 on something I really don't care for.  However, I will still buy the shirts).  It was my birthday present.  And after much to do, it ended up alright.  Let me explain...

I entered one of my parents in a lottery in February to get a chance to buy either Opening Day tickets or tickets from any (or two (they limit you)) Red Sox/Yankees games.  I (well, my mom or dad..I think my dad) didn't win the first round.  So they put our name in for a second chance to win a chance to buy the tickets.  Well, we won in the second round.  However, I had to be at school the day you could get the tickets (it was Friday, February 15).  I wasn't home to sit at the computer and wait for good seats to come along.  So i had my mom do it.  She called me up at school to ask me something about the tickets.  She eventually gave up.  My dad decided to give it a shot.  he came back with two loge box seats for two games (last night's and today's..or so we thought).  I got home from school and was WICKED excited!  I've always wanted to go to a Red Sox/Yankees game at Fenway (although I don't think I can allow myself to go back. I'm 0-3 with Yankee games, and 0-2 at home), and I was going to two.  So pretty much, it was the best birthday gift I could have.

Fast forward to July 23rd.

A few days before the games, I'm running around the house looking for the tickets.  I said we never got them, my mom doesn't remember, and my dad says we got them and that I took them.  I keep saying we didn't get them as I tear my room apart.  Needless to say, they were no where to be found.  I go online to the Red Sox ticket site to see what to do when it comes to lost tickets.  In order to replace them, you have to go to the Will-Call window the day of the game and present your receipt and ID.  So we plan to be there earlier enough to get my tickets.  Plus I like to be there as early as possible.

While driving down to Boston, I couldn't believe I was actually going to a Red Sox/Yankees game.  It felt too good to be true.  Well, it turns out it was..sort of.

We get to the ticket window and explain what happened.  So the girl was like, 'Okay, hold on.'  We waited for about 15 minutes, then the customer service guy in the booth comes on the microphone and says that we don't have the tickets.  Somewhere along the line, the information didn't match up (the name on the raffle card didn't match the billing or shipping), MLB sent us an email asking us to fix it (we never paid attention to it, apparently), and we received a credit.  I was devastated.  My mom felt terrible, and I didn't know how to react.  The guy also felt equally as bad.  He told us to go to a certain area that will remain unnamed for more than one reason, but he told us to go there because there's a good chance I'd be able to get one ticket.

As we were walking down Landsdowne Street, I thought I was going to faint.  My hearing became muffled and filed with static, and I felt light-headed, but I knew I couldn't faint there.  Luckily, I didn't faint at all.  When we arrived to the unnamed location, I no longer felt faint, but I did begin to cry.  Think about it: You drive to Boston, book a hotel, get to the field only to find out you have no tickets.  Oh yeah, and it's your birthday present.  How would you feel?  I didn't want to cry, I didn't think I would cry, but I did.  So we're at the spot, and maybe..twenty minutes later, I had a ticket that I bought for face value, and it was a better seat than the one I originally had.  How do you like that?  Josh Beckett pitched, and I had a blast.  Granted, we lost 1-0, just being there was amazing.  I still don't feel like I was there.  Even as I walked back to the Copley Plaza decked out in Red Sox garb, I couldn't believe I had just walked out of Fenway Park.

So the next day (today), I go down to the same place.  Only this time I get there at 12:30, three and a half hours before the game.  I stand out in the hot sun for almost three hours.  The girl ahead of me in line was looking for one ticket as well.  So that didn't make me feel very good about my chances.  She got her one seat.  It was standing-room-only, but it didn't matter--it's red Sox/Yankees!  In my head I was saying, "Dammit dammit dammit!  That should be MY ticket!"  So I continue to wait.  About half an hour after the girl in front of me got her ticket, I got mine.  And mine was a hell of a lot better than standing-room-only.  I had to pay more for it, but I paid face-value for it so I didn't care.  I was in Field Box 50, THREE ROWS FROM THE FIELD!!!!!  Field Box 50 is the first section behind home plate that isn't behind the net.  Needless to say, it was amazing.  Best seat I ever had.  I had an absolute blast.  Just being there was incredible (again).  And to think I almost didn't go down to try and get a ticket.

Even if the Red Sox lost, I had the best birthday presents ever.  It's still weird to think that I was there.  I don't know if I'll ever allow myself to go to another Red Sox/Yankees game, though.  My superstitions may get the better of me...

Who am I kidding?  I do believe in superstitions when it comes to baseball, but I think it's all null and void when it comes to Red Sox/Yankees games.  Anything, and I mean anything, can happen.

Happy (Almost) Birthday To Me

Tomorrow is my 18th birthday.  18!  I'm still trying to embrace it and realize that it is not as big of a number as I think it is.  So many things come with being 18--the most important one is being able to vote.  I promise I will vote.  I swear on Big Red that I will vote.  Another cool thing about being 18 is that I'll be able to enter radio contests!  I've always wanted to be able to enter radio contests.  I could have won so many free concert tickets.  I knew the answers more often than not, but I could never call in to win because I wasn't 18.  After tomorrow, that will change.

Unlike many 18-year-olds or soon-to-be 18-year-olds, I could care less about being able to drink in Canada.  That doesn't interest me: drive five hours to get drunk.  That's just silly.  On top of gas, you have to buy the alcohol, AND get a hotel room.  And the conversion rate is even.  Dollar for dollar.  Nope, sorry, you go and have fun, I'll stay home and play guitar.

Starting tomorrow I'll be able to have my own eBay account.  That's awesome.  I no longer have to use my mom's.  I'll be able to buy and sell as I please.  I actually have quite a few things I need to sell..And buy.

The only thing I'm not looking forward to about tomorrow is tomorrow.  That looks and sounds funny, doesn't it?  Well, see, for the past like..five years, I have had lame/uneventful/boring birthdays.  Last year I went to the movies with my parents, and backed into my friend's car (that put a damper on things).  Most of my friends have been gone for my birthday, and this year is no exception: Drew's in Canada, Alex is in Australia, and if they're not out of the country, then they're working.  It doesn't bother me at all this year, really.  Tomorrow might be the day I was born, but I care more about the next two days.  Instead of having tangible presents, I have something much better, and much more personal: Tickets to two Red Sox/Yankees games.  I can be in the worst mood ever, but when I think about those games I instantly become happy.  Very few things could be better than that.  Fun fact: The day of the infamous fight between A-Rod and Varitek was on my birthday, July 24th, 2004.  Thought I'd share that with you.  I think it's wicked cool.

At Long Last

For the first time ever I'm sitting in my den watching 'Stranger Than Fiction' typing this on a Macbook Pro.  Yes, a Macbook Pro.  After many months (possibly years) of asking to get a Mac, I have one.  It's not technically mine, but I get to use it until I get my own at Berklee.  I love it.  Everything about it is wonderful.  I hope that once my dad gets his paws on this he'll never want to use a PC again.  Maybe when I get back from Berklee I'll come downstairs to find a beautiful, powerful, and indestructible iMac perched upon a brand new desk.

I would take a picture of it, but the camera is kind of attached to it.  Cool.

The Who

Sometimes I forget how much I love a band or an artist. Up until about a week ago I had forgotten how much I love the Who. I really love the Who. So much so that I'm posting twice in one day. That is a rarity, and shows how much I love the Who. Did I say I love the Who? There is a good story in this, I swear. Just wait. And read.

In the past week, VH1 reminded me of how much I love the Who because this year their "rock honors" went to the Who. And last night was the actual concert and the Who played and my mom and I watched and sang and danced like fools. She was saying how she would go back "in a heart beat." We saw them in 2006, and it was the best concert ever. And if not, it definitely rivals Billy Joel. The two concerts were so different, as was the artist..So those two concerts were the best I've ever been to. Anyway, keep going, it gets good.

I've been on a cleaning binge these days. My car is spotless, my room is spotless, my basement is organized, and my virtual stuff is also clean/organized. While I was going through my old Yahoo! email account, and I don't really pay attention to anything but where the message came from. I had over 900 messages, most from Facebook, but there was one from the Who's website and the subject line was, 'The Who announce US Tour dates!' so I immediately clicked on it. And it was like fate. The show is on Friday October 24th. I'll already be in Boston, so my mom can just come down and if her friend Beverly comes with us, she can stay over there and the two can come spend Saturday with me if they want if my schedule (and theirs) permits.

See, the Who and I go back. My now famous sign debuted at the Who, and it's like I'm getting a second-chance. It couldn't be any more perfect. The tickets go on sale August 11th. I'll be in Europe, not cool, right? Wrong. I'll have the Macbook Pro at my side, and nothing can stop me from getting those tickets.

Things In My Life That Are Bad-Ass

I do not think of myself as bad-ass, but here are some things in my life that I consider to be bad-ass. In no particular order (except for Natalia and Kedzie, they are the most bad-ass things in my life. They are Number One (that's for you, Kedzie)):

--Natalia and Kedzie. Julia went to a conference in Washington DC this past March and befriended some of the coolest, nicest, and most talented kids I've ever met. Natalia hails from Nebraska, and she's probably the coolest girl I know. I've only known her for like three days, and I already love the girl. She's amazing. Why does she have to live in Nebraska? Just come and stay here. It's too bad she's not going to be in Boston this fall. I hope she transfers out there. It would make college that much better.
Kedzie is wicked awesome. His name alone is awesome. He's one of the most genuine people I've ever met. He's so sweet and innocent (haha). He means what he says. I met him earlier this year because he's an amazing runner, and the New England Championship Track Meet was held at Thornton Academy. So Julia and I went to go watch him run. He's going to BU this fall so we will definitely be hanging out.

--My dad's sudden..I don't even know what. I have no idea what came over him a few days ago, but we went from getting a Macbook Pro, to not getting a Mac at all, to getting a regular Macbook, to not getting a Mac at all, and now we're getting a Macbook Pro. It will be here by July 25th. Basically I get to use it until I get my own at Berklee, and then Steph will get the one we got, and he'll take her laptop. I love it. I can't wait for it. I was gonna let the whole idea of getting a Mac go, and then my dad said we'll get a Macbook Pro and I didn't say no. The Macbook Pro is also bad-ass.

--My new guitar case. My new guitar case is probably the most bad-ass thing ever. Look at this:





It's made by a company called MONO. I found it because of Gmail. You know how they have those little links above your inbox? Well, that one happened to catch my eye. So I clicked on it and immediately knew I had to have that case. I really needed a new case. Mine has seen it's better days. I can barely zip it sometimes. This case is basically indestructible. Which is exactly what I need. It's jet black, and it's waterproof. I could literally wear it in the shower and Big Red or USA would be fine.

--My mom. Just in general. Liz is bas-ass. She just is. I don't need to explain it because if you know her, you know she is. And if you don't know her, you're definitely missing out. She's the best.

--The Red Sox/JD Drew. The Red Sox are currently in first place and will hopefully stay in first place until the last day of the season. I'm going to two games (July 25th and July 26th) next week, and that's my birthday present. I'm wicked excited to go to those games because they aren't normal games--they're against the Yankees.
JD Drew is bad-ass because not only has he had an AMAZING season so far, he was the All-Star Game MVP, and rightfully so. No one gives him enough credit. I said it last year: he'll come in big in the playoffs and be amazing in 2008. Well, so far I'm right. Even Mr. Curit admitted that JD is playing great ball (because he is).

--Turning 18. I better just embrace it. I still think it's weird, but now I can VOTE! It's not even a question: Barack Obama has my vote. He's had my vote all along. I remember watching him on TV the day he announced he was running for President, and right then I knew that I would vote for him.

--My eye doctor (and the office staff). Yes, my eye doctor. She is the shit. I've been to the eye doctor's like..eight times this month, and I really don't mind (I actually enjoy it) because she's so cool. We still haven't figured out my prescription yet. I'm going back next week..For (roughly) the ninth time this month. It's going to be strange not going after we figured out what I need.

--All the concerts I've been to. Actually, this piggy-backs my mom's bad-assness. I've seen so many great artists this year and if my mom didn't like concerts, I wouldn't have been to half as many.

--My family. My whole family is awesome.

--My friends. I have the best friends anyone could ask for.

--Berklee. Berklee is going to be amazing. It's right around the corner! I can't wait. I really can't. Well, actually the only thing that makes me sad about going to Berklee is below. And most of you know what it is already.

--Bob. I don't think I would ever describe Bob as bad-ass to someone, but right now he can be. Without Bob, I wouldn't even be going to Berklee. The saddest part about going to Berklee isn't leaving my best friends (half of them will be in Boston/the Boston area anyway, except Drew and Jordan), it's knowing that I won't see Bob on a weekly basis. That is the only drawback to going, but I have to go. He knows it, I know it, the world knows it. The first person I plan on seeing when I get home is Bob. Definitely Bob. I'll get home, and probably immediately call him up.

So yeah, I'm sure there are a few things I forgot to mention, but I got the bulk of them covered.

Do You Ever Wanna Be More?

I'm not going to begin to try and describe how amazing John Mayer was Saturday night because I can't. He was too good for words. It was my third time seeing him, and the first time I didn't cry of excitement when he came on stage (in a Red Sox jersey. Coco Crisp's to be specific). And like usual, he talked to the crowd a lot and one thing that he said really stuck with me:
"I think it's safe to say that everybody in the world is driven by the need to want to be more than they were yesterday..Or more tomorrow than today. I'm obsessed with it."
That's not the whole quote, he continues on about hotel keys and how he needs to keep it in a lead box because he might "really have to poop later." Hilarious, yes. He then went into one of my favorite songs, "Bigger Than My Body."

It's safe to say that John Mayer and I have the same theory. It's not about wanting more, it's about wanting to be more. If you are more, you'll get more, but that's not the reason I want to be more. It's hard to explain where my drive comes from, or what it even is. I've got most of it figured out. I just need some more time to get it all sorted out. I gotta test some waters and see what feels best. I think I know the answer, but I'll keep it to myself and a few close friends for the time being.

Drive is a funny thing. It's funny how much it's changed over time. When was the last time you heard someone want to say, "I want to be a mailman," (And no, Mr. Stebbins doesn't count) or anything like that. You ask a seventeen-year-old what he or she wants and more often than not you'll get, "I don't know," which is fine--you have your whole life to figure it out. It's either "I don't know" or "I want to be famous." Okay, for what? That seventeen-year-old doesn't have an answer. Do you want to be a reporter? An actor? A musician (yes, please)? An athlete? A businessman? Pick something! Fame is not an occupation. Ignore those people that are just famous for being famous (Paris Hilton, and anyone on MTV). They don't count. They don't do anything.

I can't remember who said it but fame is just a good seat in a restaurant. And if you're talented enough and driven enough, you can attain fame. Maybe not right away, but it will come. It will come. Another thing that was lost (the first is a sense of reality I guess you'd say) is patience. Like the lion in front of the New York Public Library. Patience, my friend, is a virtue.